Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice-Author unknown.

Have you ever seen a young child talking to himself or herself? It is not uncommon to see young children indulge in self talk and sociodramatic play. They could go on and on for hours speaking on behalf of their toys , making up wonderful dialogs and stories. I have often wondered and marveled at this amazing skill which needs no teaching and transports children into a creative world instantly! Self talk is often dismissed as rubbish by adults and its valuable benefits are overlooked.

In reality Self talk or private speech adds much benefits to Children’s development. communication and language is the obvious foremost but it goes way beyond that. It has been proven that self-regulation, emotion-regulation, memory, motivation and of course creativity are all linked to self talk. If we  wait for a few minutes in the shadows and listen to the private speech kids engage in ,we can pick up many clues as to what their little minds are processing. Most of these dialogs are instructions to self or self-regulation in an imaginary situation. “Hey Spiderman! Don’t go near that huge fire, it will burn you!” at times emotional regulation ,”Don’t feel sad Ninja, you can win the battle next time.” It has been proven that self talk also enhances memory and motivation. ” Common Lego batman! You can do it! Just try a little harder.” Essentially children are teaching themselves social skills through indulging in self talk. With every new character, setting and story they make up they are exercising their creative muscles and adding to their creative skills.

If you are interested to read more about Private speech or Self talk, you can find information here .

As a curious mother I have enjoyed watching my boys create their own world and engage themselves in creative self talk but as they grew older and started school ,I noticed unpleasant language and unkind situations creep into their imaginary world. I knew interrupting them and correcting them would not be a proper approach and I had to find ways to introduce positive self talk which could add benefits to their developing social skills. The most simple, direct and outright way I could come up with to introduce this was to just model it.

If I was cooking with my boys hanging out in the background, I would talk aloud ,” Dinner is taking longer than I expected but I am going to PERSEVERE because PERSEVERANCE will help me accomplish any task. I just have to break up the task into tiny chunks so it feels EASY.” Or if I am upset with cars in the traffic I think aloud to myself  ,” Having to  wait in traffic is tiring me but I will divert my mind and listen to MUSIC because MUSIC CALMS MY MIND when I feel upset.” I feel self talk can be used in many more creative ways to decipher information and help with problem solving . Indulging in positive self talk can become a valuable tool for Self-motivation and to achieve goals!


Featured image courtesy: pixabay



8 thoughts on “Self talk

  1. Omg wow! This is so so helpful. My little one doesn’t talk yet but this will definitely come in handy when he does. And I could completely picture the scene in the kitchen and being stuck in traffic, happens to me all the time. Its when we mums need to be very careful – the slightest negative reaction is picked up by kids in an instant.


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